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Welcome to Stephen Kennedy's website dedicated to Minatare, Nebraska!
Minatare is a little hick town of about 800 people and it's about the next closest thing to being
unincorporated. The total number of operational businesses on main street can be counted on barely
more than one hand (make that one hand if your family tree actually has roots in Minatare).
There are also just as many churches in Minatare as there are operational businesses on main street.
The sign on the left is located at the corner of main street and highway 26. It actually used to belong
to a bar that stood behind it. The bar burned down back in 1997, now it's the official Minatare city
highway sign. Holy crap, are those actually bullet holes? Looks like the cops got bored sitting behind
the sign shooting radar and decided to just shoot the damn sign instead.
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The 25 foot tall eyesore in the picture to the right is the reason why we say "Smell The Difference".
The feedlot is close enough that you can hear the cattle anywhere in town. And if you can hear the cattle,
then you can sure as hell smell them too! Which really makes it hard to believe the county assessor had
the balls to raise property taxes here in 2005. And people really wonder why so many houses sit empty
and unsold in Minatare? The haze that oozes from the feedlot at night makes the highway completely
disappear (talk about a multiple car pile-up just waiting to happen). People here say that's
the smell of money. No, that's the smell of bullshït!
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To the left are some pictures taken of the "business district" in Minatare. Judging
by the scrawlings on the outside of the old church, it appears that it's no longer used as a church
and they sell honey there now. Are there actually bee hives inside? The middle picture is the Minatare
city office, public library, and our police station. Yes, you read that correctly.
On the south wall just as you enter the building, there is a cheesie homemade sign taped up that says
"If you don't vote, don't complain". The pinhead who made
up the sign obviously doesn't realize that their salary is paid by tax dollars, not by votes, and they
weren't hired to do their job by the voters. If that's how it worked, they'd all be unemployed. Geez,
take two clues and call a shrink in the morning! The building in the lower left photo used to be on the
far south end of main street up until March of 2006, but it was haunted by redneck ghosts and imploded
on itself during an exorcism.
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To the right are some pictures of a few of the fine residential properties in Minatare. If you have
never seen a trailer house painted with flourescent lavender Sears Weather-Beater exterior latex, then
you really are missing out on some of the finer things in life! There are almost as many trailer houses
on residential lots in Minatare as there are in the trailer park. As you can see, the county assessor
was totally justified in raising everybody's property taxes in 2005. I mean, just look at the quality
of these properties! People are just sitting on architectural gold mines in Minatare, what took the
county assessor so long to realize it? Rumor has it that there is an underground mosquito farm here
that is run by the county and they needed more funding due to rising energy costs. That explains the
tax increase, and why they no longer spray for mosquitos in the summer around here.
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