One Year, and Still No Facebook

Here we are in the first couple weeks of January 2022, and people are still trying to tell me “oh, you’ll be back”. Sounds to me more like they’re trying to convince themselves rather than trying to convince me. Sorry, that shit ain’t happening, there is nothing good about Fakebook and it’s only going to get worse with this Meta bullshit. I don’t need Mark “Zuckface” Fuckerberg telling me what I can and can’t make jokes about and silencing me if I don’t assimilate to his bullshit and propaganda.

People are so addicted to Fakebook that if you quit, everybody else has the withdrawals on your behalf because they can’t stand not knowing what you are doing. What am I doing now? Well, for starters, I’m not watching people behave like complete fucking idiots every day. Not being bombarded by endless political douchebaggery, oh poor me stories, retarded fake life hacks, pictures of everybody’s food and drink, and duck-face selfies every day is quite a refreshing change!

Now I see in my favorite meme review videos that I regularly watch, people on Fakebook are playing into that “10-Year Challenge” photo bullshit again. How can people be so fucking stupid and not realize that the only purpose for these is to fine-tune facial recognition systems? Fucking morons, they “claim” that they are all against big brother spying on them, but they fall for these scams initiated by big brother and just mindlessly play along. You can’t fix stupid, you can pound on it with a hammer all day, but you can’t fix it.

Still, like clockwork, people send me text messages out of the blue asking when I’m coming back. Hmmm, let’s see, you were able to send me a text message, so you know my phone number. I’m betting that you also know how to get to my house. Seems to me like we still have a very functional communications mechanism, so I don’t see what benefit there would be for me to create a new account on Fakebook. Stop by for a visit!

The people who send me messages like that are almost always people who tell me that the only reason they stay on Fakebook is because “that’s the only way I have to stay in touch with my kids”. Ummm, sorry, that’s called cognitive dissonance. You simply don’t want to admit that you can still communicate with them and share pictures via text message and email. Just admit it, you’re addicted to social media now and can’t make it through the day without your fix. You’re addicted to watching everybody else’s fake life and trying to keep up with them.

Good little sheep…As long as you think a stream of garbage and watching people’s fake depictions of how great their life is compared to yours, is a fair trade for tracking you and spying on you, then Mark “Zuckface” Fuckerberg loves you and your gullibility.